USA: The United Statues for Anti-Modi

Ever since 2017, I was used to having satirical giggles at the United States of America. Having the famous Statue of Liberty on one side and the adorable velvety-haired clown as the head of their distinguished federal government on the other is equivalent to irony running through deep tranches of justification!


That was limited only till November 2018. Thanks to the Statue of Unity. Leftists and the evergreen liberal community are running high on their excitement level. For obvious reasons. The more the adventurous such government activities are, the more ecstatic these enlightened 'freedom-of-speech' lovers transform into.


Ignoring all the intellectual community miscreants, let's focus on this uniquely sculpted statue.
Without ignoring all the technical aspects associated with the showpiece, the media forgot to mention one particular feature: The highly-powered nano-tech GPS module that is kept hidden inside the statue and which can be tracked even by extra-terrestrial beings zillions of light years away, to navigate towards our planet. Yeah. not to mention its importance just like those which were allegedly attached to the newly-printed 2000-rupee notes back in the day which was the pinnacle of flagship features. Remember?





"There was an idea. To bring together a group of remarkable people. ......Blah Blah..."
This was just a statement until the Statue of Unity was erected! Yes, Unity. United we stand, divided we fall.

Suppose you have 3000 crore rupees in hand. What would you do with it, taking into consideration all the problems surrounding the country?


One of the topmost problems our country is currently facing: Lack of jobs for our youths. Are you thinking exactly what I am now?


Yes! The government did the most honorable thing to tackle this headache. Yes! Build a statue out of nowhere. And the tallest one! Ask me how?

The labor force that was hired for the job was equivalent to the population of Bangladeshis wanting to infiltrate India via Dhubri. Imagine the number! The nearby hotels and restaurants will be profiting off from the huge number of tourists that will visit the monument. Students will be forever indebted for the potential field trips to this 8th Wonder of the World. Who doesn't love field trips? Unemployed engineers across the country will be employed here and would be cleaning off the dust from the statue. The workforce in this department would be unimaginable! Doctors would also be employed as they would be operating on all these mentioned people, because of their strenuous work. Stress busters as usual! Lawyers would be busy exerting and fighting for the rights of engineers, employed as cleaning agents. The Kanhaiyya Kumars and their gangs would be busy shouting and demanding freedom. (Not for Kashmir) The Gandhi prince will be busy staging another hugging act, this time with the statue. Not to forget his waking up that morning at night. Modi will be busy acknowledging how the statue would help fight corruption. Blind bhakts will be busy bathing the statue with the purest form of cow piss. Meme pages will be occupied with showcasing how the statue would look like a colorful glowing object from space on Diwali night, as viewed by NASA's satellites. Yogi will now be shifting his focus on renaming this marvel as 'Ektantra ka Murrti'. The world renowned Bengali-Didi would be busy explaining as to how this statue would pose as a direct conflict for Bangladeshis. Kejriwal would be busy throwing accusations as to how this statue is actually an assassination plot by Modi to eliminate him. Indian filmmakers would now finally get over Allauddin and focus more on Iron Man movies. News channels would be busy covering all this. Overall, every single person would be employed. Waah Modi Ji Waah!


And after all this time, we have all been assuming that the World is at Sharda University!

Comments

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