Absolute Barbecue: The Meat Heaven
Hyderabad is a place which one would generally associate with food. During my generous stay at this wondrous city, venturing to a few of the many food joints was definitely in my itinerary. One of the intriguing memories was our visit to Absolute Barbecue's. For your info, Absolute Barbecue's is similar to Barbeque Nation. That is, starters, main course and desserts in a buffet system. The only difference is that AB's has an enormous amount of extra variety of meat. Yes!
It was a one hour journey to AB's from where we stayed. The powerful sun over Hyderabad makes life very difficult. On certain days the mercury levels are high enough to turn ice directly into clouds. We had to tackle an extreme chunk of heat, along-with that our eardrums had to gong onto the absurd honking of vehicles, our eyes had to deal with large hoardings of regional party members who were thronging each of their 16-pairs of teeth and our nostrils had to go through the aroma of every roadside stall on our way, which increased our hunger tenfold. Each of our senses worked so athletically we felt like Spider-Man minus the web slinging. And obviously Mary Jane.
As soon as we reached AB's, the person at the counter greeted us as if we were Ali Baba and the 40 thieves. We had to wait an entire 20 minutes as none of the tables were available. Those were the longest 20 minutes of our lives.
It felt like our next birth, by the time we entered the food arena. As we walked in, the aroma of the wide variety of cuisine available hit us hard. People were filled in numbers. There was food. The widest range I had ever seen. Biryani, barbecues, chicken, mutton, fish, prawns, paneer, mocktails, cocktails, beer and what not! The variety of meat was so wide that if any PETA member ever visited the place, they would have probably hanged themselves using elongated strands of Hakka noodles, dipped in mutton curry.
The dawn of our food marathon was initiated with the starters. The available choices were too many to even illustrate here. By the time we had finished, our tummies were probably stretched to 10 times the normal size. We had to hibernate before we proceeded to the main course. The main course was unexpectedly unexampled. There was literally an exotic meat counter. Two poor rabbits, obviously roasted juicily, hung above that counter. The two chefs present there were chopping, mixing and preparing an exclusive blend according to your own choice. There was rabbit meat, emu meat, kiwi, quail, duck and octopus to name a few. For the first time in my life I was about to eat meat outside the domain of chicken, duck and mutton. I was about to take the leap of faith towards attaining impurity in the food department. If my mom had performed an 'agni-pariksha' on my homecoming, I would've surely failed it. Sigh! We ate like monsters. We devoured until we looked like extreme conglomeration of bullfrogs. We spent nearly 4 hours eating the shit out of our minds. We were barely being able to breath. We looked like savages by the end of it. I felt as if I won't be able to eat a single morsel for the rest of my life. Alas, that was all I can remember. The short-term memory lapse afterwards might have been due to the excessive digestive process that our brain had to order to our tummies. I have stretch marks on my belly till this day.
Ok. Bye. Happy Eating.
The dawn of our food marathon was initiated with the starters. The available choices were too many to even illustrate here. By the time we had finished, our tummies were probably stretched to 10 times the normal size. We had to hibernate before we proceeded to the main course. The main course was unexpectedly unexampled. There was literally an exotic meat counter. Two poor rabbits, obviously roasted juicily, hung above that counter. The two chefs present there were chopping, mixing and preparing an exclusive blend according to your own choice. There was rabbit meat, emu meat, kiwi, quail, duck and octopus to name a few. For the first time in my life I was about to eat meat outside the domain of chicken, duck and mutton. I was about to take the leap of faith towards attaining impurity in the food department. If my mom had performed an 'agni-pariksha' on my homecoming, I would've surely failed it. Sigh! We ate like monsters. We devoured until we looked like extreme conglomeration of bullfrogs. We spent nearly 4 hours eating the shit out of our minds. We were barely being able to breath. We looked like savages by the end of it. I felt as if I won't be able to eat a single morsel for the rest of my life. Alas, that was all I can remember. The short-term memory lapse afterwards might have been due to the excessive digestive process that our brain had to order to our tummies. I have stretch marks on my belly till this day.
Ok. Bye. Happy Eating.
Hold on !!!! This literally became one of my favourite blog post! Laughed the entire read.
ReplyDelete