The Beardless Engineer: No Shave November

It's that time of the year again. Beard is one thing which makes the confidence level of a male human sore record high. On the downside, it also stings a person who receives a passionate lock from another with a face filled with facial strands of hair. Romantic or not? When I was a toddler, even I used to get a lot of kisses from grown ass humans. Both males and females. Not that I have a finger count of all of them but I didn't mind the females. For obvious reasons. But when the males did their part, their thorn like whiskers were pointy enough to electrify my chubby cheeks. I loved that. Similar to this point, the entire post would be filled with gravely questionable stuff. Feel free to identify the sarcasm without being pointed out.

It is a Universal fact that people with beards look dashing. And contagiously suave. And justifying every such theory, there are first hand examples of people who showcase exactly that. Admiration is just a word. Everything else is elementary, my dear. And yes, this very creature from the homo sapiens family too possess that flair. Just look at his determination. #NoShaveNovember

These legends had an immense influence on how I honored beards from a third-person perspective. And once I acquired the conscious awareness that girls drool over bearded gentleman, I became dedicated on growing a beard too. I had to somehow. Passion became addiction. I had to science the shit out of cultivating a beard. Growing a beard wouldn't really be a tough challenge. At least less challenging than the dream of becoming the PM of our country. Right?

Time flies by real quick. The area around my jaws have defied time and age in such a manner that the Theory of Relativity would fall flat on my hairless tummy. The barren land has remained unchanged till this day. I had failed. And miserably. On the other hand, all my friends sport trendy beards on their cheeks. They even complain as to how quickly their beards re-grow after they shave it. Even though, deep down, I cry like a mutilated member of the anti-BJP gang, at these confessions but my face has always managed to sport this smile.

Over two decades of my life has passed since I have been born and I am yet to taste the despicable scent of shaving foam or cream on my cheeks practically. And to see people so happily shed away their blades and commercially generous shaving creams for an entire month to hashtag each other with a trendy urban movement and for Instagram selfies, I can only moan, 'Winter is Coming'. No shave November? But for me it has been forever. Naturally naughty but beardless beyond twenty. And then a certain somebody threw me this question, "You can't grow a beard, can you?"

I mean, not that I can't. What is there to 'can't grow a beard'. But it doesn't. Nature doesn't allow me to. (Unless you visit Dr. Batra's, maybe) The non-probable features of my genetic code has been shaped to function only in a certain manner. Such an absurd question to ask. No offense for the puny minded intellect. Until I was wished,

"Happy Children's Day"

Oh c'mon!
#NoShaveForever