PUBG: Winner winner, Sabzee Dinner

For a human being, sleep and food are the two most important things for survival. Smart-ass beings will try to sneak in oxygen in this list of important things. Oxygen isn't something we choose to inhale through our nose or mouth. We don't even have a clue as to how our lungs filter out the other useless gases from the air we breath in. It's not exactly a voluntary action although we can control our breath for probably a minute or two. But basically we don't schedule our timings for the intake of oxygen. Aah, never mind. My life had been sailing in a smooth pace with everything within my time zone until I encountered this new addictive game called PUBG. At first, I found the name as well as the humans playing it, including my brother quite funny. I laughed at how these puny little beings wasted hours of their 24-hour day cycle playing a significantly unrealistic game in their smart-ass phones. I felt pity for these self-ignorant homo sapiens. I almost composed an emotional bard assailing their new trend. And then one day, my brother made me an offer I couldn't refuse. The rest, as they say is history.

Fast forward to today. I consume approximately at least half of my entire day playing this seriously obsessive game which is compelling enough to gulp down hours of our time at the snap of our mere fingers. Minutes turn to hours. And hours turn to days. This is in addition to the heavenly late night hours of mopping our eyes through the bright screen of lighted enigma. The pleasure of killing those unworthy opponents inside the game steals away the bliss and luxury of a good night sleep. Most of them are AI characters or bots anyway. Earlier, I used to sleep by 11 pm because I have always been a morning person by default. Nowadays, I doze off at around 3, by which time even the well spirited ghosts are way past their prime midnight hunting time. I have involuntarily transformed myself into a night owl. Winner winner, Chicken dinner maybe? And yeah, I occasionally even forget to consume my normal home-made dinner. Forget about the chicken. And the emotional thrashes from mom.

My description of this game shouldn't necessarily mean that I have mastered the game. I am still a noob. I have been shot dead more number of times than the number of VIVO and OPPO hoardings around the city of Guwahati. It doesn't matter if you are a pure vegetarian or a vegan or a pork lover. Irrespective of your caste, creed, religion or gender, you will be served with a chicken dinner if you survive till the end and win a game. Such a secular initiative. I have turned into a serious addict myself. Boys and girls of all ages play this game and have skilled it in an impressive manner. My paltry phone doesn't even support the game. But thankfully the spare phone at home has the audacity to run the game, albeit some in-game lags due to the prodigious wi-fi installed in my home. Sarcasm intended.

Till then, Happy searching for vehicles.

p.s: Girls who play PUBG are actually hot!